Red Hiding Hood (in theaters now), is an updated fairy tale about a young woman named Valerie (Amanda Seyfried) who is caught between two suitors — idealistic Henry (Max Irons) and bad-boy Peter (Shiloh Fernandez) — in a town besieged by a blood-thirsty werewolf. It doesn’t have a single vampire. There’s no high-school-is-hell subplot. And Hood is set in an old-timey village that looks like it was probably fossil-fodder by the time Twilight‘s Bella (Kristen Stewart) was born. And yet, it’s hard to watch Red Riding Hood without having an odd feeling of Twilight déjà vu. Can’t put your finger on the cause? Let’s break down the similarities:
1. They’re both directed by Catherine Hardwicke. But that’s a gimme, so moving on…
2. Werewolf alert. Still too easy. Next!
3. Lines like “One bite… and you’ll be like me.” This is getting ridiculous. Let’s try to think of a hard one now. Like, how about…
4. Identical dads. How’s this for a weird coincidence: The guys who play Valerie and Bella’s dads might as well be cousins they look so much alike. Crazy, right? Wait, hang on a sec. They actually are both played by the exact same actor? Come on. This isn’t even fun now.
5. Gloomy, woodsy town. Okay, here’s a good one: Hood takes place in a forested, gray-skied village that might as well be a medieval version of Twilight‘s Forks, Washington.
7. Love triangle. Valerie’s heart is torn between loyal Henry and dangerous Peter both of whom are prone to making woozy declarations of their love. They might as well be wearing their own Team Jacob/Team Edward shirts under their tunics.
8. Hot-blooded heroine. Hood‘s Valerie and Twilight‘s Bella might not know which guy they should choose, but that doesn’t stop them from having steamy moments with each of their suitors — in a strictly PG-13 sense, of course.
9. Cloak chic. Looks like Valerie and the Volturi went shopping at the same branch of Hood Depot. I mean Cape Town. Cowls R’ Us. No wait, I’ll think of a good one…
10. "Goth" soundtrack. Both movies are scored with pulsing, hurts-so-good emo music.
If you saw Red Riding Hood, what did you think?