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Anyone care to critique the following abstract pieces? It is to be a part of a book, a prologue if you will. Whatcha think?


Sword against sword, the cold wind swirling the snow flurries around. As beautiful and majestic as this scene appeared, it was fueled by livid rage and furious tenacity. Like two equal forces, forever doomed to fight fist to fist till the sheer weight of them both crushed all their combined energy. Blood splatter covered the previously white and pristine snow. Muddy ruts had been dug into the ground by the force of boots, digging heel first into the ground as they tried valiantly to hold their ground. Both were more than eager to deliver the death blow. Roaring forces, like blinding light and sonic shrieks of echoing sounds swirled about, destroying all in their paths. The battle carried on, completely untouched by time or space, within the writhing death cyclone. The energy of the battle would soon begin to wan though, and one force’s stamina would surely falter…and at that precise moment, the other’s energy and raving emotions would come smashing, sucking the life, and utterly destroying the other with a mixture of force and momentum.


Life in it’s pure mystery is a whirlwind ride to live on. We find ourselves baffled by the actions and emotions of humanity, including our own. If a vagabond sheds a tear for the prince, and the emperor lends a hand to the lowly street urchin, would we still consider it human to declare war on them the very next day? I think so. Ungrateful, yet so. Careless, yet cautious. Beautiful, but ugly. Think not of what you wish to do, but what you will do. We are gifted with humanity, intelligence, and the ability to believe and hope. Let us not waste the gifts. As a lone soldier, march for your destiny. As a member of a single body, march to fate. The beauty of being human..? Having the mind for choice and change, of course.


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