Jacob is alive. Edward is dead. Jacob is warm and cuddly. Edward is an ice cube. He has to cuddle on top of the sheet so Bella doesn’t freeze. Jacob is happy and smiles all the time. Edward is moodier than a PMSing adolescent. Jacob listens to Bella and compromises. Edward decides what’s good for Bella and dictates. Jacob makes Bella happy. Edward makes Bella anxious and obsessive. Jacob and Bella have equal power in their relationship. Edward has all the power. Jacob made Bella sad for two weeks. Edward make Bella suicidally depressed for many months. It takes Jacob one day to apologize for making Bella miserable. It takes Edward most of a year and a whole lot of drama. Bella loves Jacob for his sunny personality. Bella loves Edward cuz he smells good and looks pretty. Jacob’s age difference to Bella is two years. Edward’s is one hundred (robbing the cradle much?). Jacob is only dangerous to Bella when he’s angry. Edward is dangerous all the time (especially once a month: If Bella’s paper cut puts him on edge, what does her period do?). To be with Jacob, Bella would live life to its fullest. To be with Edward, Bella would say goodbye to all family and friends and DIE. Did I mention: Jacob is hot. Edward is freezing. Who wants to cuddle with an ice cube?

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