Alexa dreamer20's blog

Breaking Dawn, Official Trailer 2

2011-09-18T15:00:33Z

Hey guys,

So, given the new Breaking Dawn trailer I've just finished watching, I must say, I am completely disappointed. Although, it does exactly what the book has done: made me believe it was from another Saga. There's just no connection, and to prove my point:

In this second trailer, we see, for one, the werewolf pack attacking the Cullens, which doesn't happen in the book. They plan it, but never act on it. I suppose they were desperate for some action, since all that happens is we see Bella slowly dying.

Robert Pattinson looks so changed, and it's not just him, of course, it's everyone else. Also, you've noticed that already.

Kristen Stewart's hair and make up for the wedding was not impressing at all, contrary to everyone in the book insisting she looks stunning and what not. I wasn't looking for overboard, I was looking for a little bit of finesse, instead of her coming out in a wedding dress and bangs in her face like she wasn't done with her hair. She is naturally beautiful- they could've done better. This is just my opinion, if people think she looked as described in the book, fine. I'm not going to start an argument.

I don't like Alice and Carlisle at all, and they were two of my 4 favorite characters.

I have a hunch I'm going to feel much annoyance towards Bella in this movie, if I'm even going to watch it.

Jacob I'm not even going to talk about; thoroughly disappointed there.

Aro looks weirder than EVER, and I had to use caps, because he just DOES!

These lines annoy me so much:

"If you kill her, you kill me."

"You're the enemy now. Sam won't hesitate; he will be smart."

And what takes the cake:

"You have to accept what is" or whatever she says.

This would have been a whole lot simpler if they just ripped Rosalie and Emmet apart, and whoever else they needed to, knocked Bella out and just gotten the damn thing out and we wouldn't be here. Please excuse my brutality- I am extremely annoyed, though.

I'm not going to rant much longer, so if you've read this far, thank you. The conclusion:

Overall, I am disappointed. I felt very awkward watching the trailer, and as someone on the internet said, I also felt like I was watching the whole movie in 2 minutes.

I assumed here you have seen the trailer- I haven't been on here for weeks, probably. There's could've been a blog, or whatever, about it. Everyone seems to be ahead of me when it comes to news. If not, and this is a one in a million event, then here it is:

Added by A Wikia contributor

Super-obsessed Twilight Fans

2011-07-16T20:32:16Z

....So I see they still exist. I was going through some Reasons lists today and, just as always, was shocked to find some reasons there were irrelevant: Ten Reasons why Edward is the best: "Because he's Edward.", Jacob-hating(I don't think you need an example), or purely disgusting: "Because he makes contracting the Spanish influenza sound hot.".

Yeah, so, what's up with that? For lack of better grammar after reading..that.

Do people not understand the concept of a Ten Reasons-or more- list? I mean, most of those might be put up by AUs, but still. There are still fanatics out there.*creepy music starts playing in background*

Is a logged in user one of those?>:) I am so curious.

True Blood

2011-06-26T20:31:45Z

Sooooooo.. is there anyone here who watches True Blood? I just wanted to know if I should, and wanted someone with vampiric abilities(I'm not referring to Pudding here, not at all) and experience(because I trust you guys with sporks and stakes) to point me in the right direction(not in the sun, mind you) given my lack of inspiration lately.

That's all. Thank you. Anticipated.

Alexa_dreamer20 (talk) 20:31, June 26, 2011 (UTC)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO TWILIGHT!!!

2011-06-02T19:11:06Z

Soooo I just realized Twilight was born on the fateful day of June 2nd, 2003, which was like, by my math, 8 years ago. 8 FRICKIN YEARS, guys!!

(Well actually it is June 2nd here, so sorry to be late or early, or repetitive, I dunno)

Happy Anny!

Added by Alexa dreamer20

New Fic

2011-05-13T21:01:09Z

So, I know I haven't been around here in a while even if I do come back every day, but I have something to share::

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3883938/1/Family_Therapy_Cullen_Style

This fic in hilarious, well at least I know I almost choked on some chapters. Really guys, I know there are tons of fics with the Cullens IMing or passing notes or going to therapy, but this.. this is ROFl stuff. At least for me.

So.. I don't really want to spoil anything, but here is some passages and stuff that might want to make you read it.

"His...name...Dr. ...Dover...Benjamin...oh my gosh.. ..." At this point Bella and Jasper both exploded which set off Emmett again.

I glared at Edward and thought What the hell is so funny Edward? You guys are acting like two year olds.

Edward closed his eyes to regain his composure, knowing my patience was past it's limit and we hadn't even seen the doctor yet. "Carlisle...his name is Benjamin Dover...get it..." Alice and Rosalie started howling so they obviously did "Dr. Ben...Dover. His parents must not have liked him very much..." And with that, my normally composed son, fell out of his chair."

"Hello, Dr. Dover. My name is Edward Cullen and this is my girlfriend Bella Swan." He extended his hand out to me, and again I was met with an extremely frigid hand.

Strong grip, confident, didn't let his girlfriend introduce herself...control issues obviously.

I noticed Edward's eyes change from lighthearted to serious quickly. Mood swings too... He sighed and leaned back in his chair as Bella shook my hand timidly. She hid her face behind her hair as some sort of protection as she blushed.

Self confidence issues...probably brought on by the overbearing boyfriend.

Another scowl from Edward. Anger issues too...possibly Bi-polar.

Next to introduce them self was the smallest Cullen, who was now bouncing in her seat with excitement. "My name is Mary Alice Brandon Cullen but you can call me Alice!" She was a very high energy person I could tell by all the bouncing.

Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder possibly, with some impulse control issues as well. I wonder if she's ever been on medication for it.

"Jasper Hale." Was all the tall lanky blond said, barely making eye contact with me.

Emotionally withdrawn, possible depression, a man of few words.

"So, I just want to make sure I got all this information right. Four months ago, Edward tried to kill himself because he thought that Bella had died. This was a mistake that both of his sisters passed on to him because at the time they believed it to be true?" Everyone mumbled a quick yes. OK, I can live with that part of it...we could work on those things. Another deep breath.

"Bella somehow saved him and they are happy now. And the reason Edward and Bella weren't happy back then was because Edward had left her, to keep her safe, after Jasper tried to kill her on her birthday. But Bella has forgiven him for that. Is that fairly accurate?" I scanned the room, waiting for someone to correct me. Waiting, waiting, waiting. I almost threw up when I saw all eight heads nodding in confirmation.

I grabbed the telephone. "Stephenie, cancel my next three appointments, this may take a while."

"How often do you steal Bella's clothes?"

"Um- well, I never thought about it before...daily I guess."

"Every day, you steal some of her clothes? What do you do with the clothes you take from Bella?"

Good question, I'd like to know that too. I thought to myself.

Alice was caught off guard by the question. "I give them to a group of homeless people that live down by the river." Alice mumbled quietly.

"You give my clothes to the River People? Are you nuts? So you're telling me, that the sweater my dear grandma gave me for my birthday last year that 'made my hips look huge' is being worn by a hobo named Buzzy?" I screamed.

"No Bella, don't be absurd. Buzzy doesn't wear your clothes, he burns them in the fire for heat. Your wardrobe is heating the homeless." I still don't know how she said it with a straight face. Rosalie burst into hysterical laughter. Apparently, Rosalie didn't know about Alice's relationship with the homeless community but she was enjoying herself thoroughly.

"Tell me the truth, please Rose. Are you hungry right now?"

"You have no idea." she hissed in my direction. Her eyes were black as coal.

"Stephenie, come here for a minute." Dr. Dover said into the phone. A second later, Stephenie arrived in the doorway. "Yes doctor?"

"Bring me an apple please."

Okay guys, I have tried to give as much away without boring you to tears because most of this stuff is great in the actual context, and also without extending too much. A.. or so. It's one of the funniest fics I've ever read, one of the most popular too, with over 7000 reviews.

The Idea!

2011-03-13T13:07:03Z

I've been having this question running through my mind, and I know that kinda every character has been paired with.. just about every other character in the Saga, but how would you feel about Seth imprinting on Ness?

That would be the cutest thing, in my opinion.Alexa_dreamer20 (talk) 13:07, March 13, 2011 (UTC)

Top Ten Lists are Overrated

2011-02-09T20:47:54Z

Really, it always amazes me how these top tens are done in such manner they make Twilight the supreme perfection, to emphasize a point. Especially the ones that begin with "Top 10 reasons.."

Well guys, if you hadn't noticed, those aren't real reasons or even close to what a reason should sound like.

So I would like to say the following....

The reason why the Twilight series are amazing isn't because they are amazing.

Carlisle Cullen isn't awesome because he's secretly Santa Claus and he brings you presents every year.

The awesomeness of Edward Cullen doesn't come from the non-fact that he "was" in Harry Potter.

The reason why the Volturi want to destroy the Cullens....."because they are afraid the Cullens will destroy them and take their power", and..."because they are afraid."

Reasons you should be on team Rosalie...don't.

So basically the reason you should be on team Seth is because Boo Boo Stewart is hot.

Bella is stupid...because people just can't take the fact Kristen Stewart is beautiful. Leave.Kristen.Alone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So what are you saying? That Twilight is wrong because of the-supposedly-sexual scenes in Breaking Dawn? Oh they didn't need to explain everything in detail?

Ohhhhh wait...they don't.-.-'

It was actually a huge mistake that Catherine Hardwicke did not include Twilight page by page in the movie. Such a shame they took 4 seconds away for the waitress.

Alec's cuteness is all you need to keep you going through all those pages and pages of Edward angst and Bella whimper.

So basically that doesn't even begin to cover it, but I just wanted to point out how fans tend to lose their common sense and start acting like a 3 year old. I'm telling you, Edward is REAL!! REAL I TELL YOU!

Alexa_dreamer20 (talk) 20:47, February 9, 2011 (UTC)

It's dying down

2011-01-23T21:13:06Z

Whew... the first blog post in a while...wow.

Well...why in a while? Because...because of the same reason I haven't edited ANYTHING (oh, it's good to know it still hurts to say it, whatev, write it) in...I can't remember.

I can(or am trying) to shamefully say I have only left a comment or two or talked to a certain person who at least keeps me coming back around here( thank you thank you thank you Steph) to not lose...the whatever connection I have left with this site..and the day count..cause I'd freak, which means I kind of still care.

The thing is, I don't think about Twilight all that much anymore, I'm not very excited about it...I just don't see much in it anymore. My Twilight Obsession Is Dying Down...again. I know I've experienced it before, but then I used to talk about Twilight, like a Twi-nerd, without showing much interest in it, just corrected all my friends whenever they'd make a remark.(not defend, correct!)

So what can I do..............I'm lost. I really don't want to lose what I have here for a minor break..and I don't know anything that can spike up my interest. I'm jumping up and down at thoughts like Christian Bale shooting the third part of the Batman franchise in Bucharest...and with Anne Hathaway..whereas BD is months away..

I just don't know anything that can keep Twilight sticking to me.

HEEEEEEEEEEEELPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Can you find the weirdest Twilight fact?

2010-12-30T12:59:17Z

There are a lot of pretty weird things going on in the Twilight Saga, movies or books, but more likely books. What would the weirdest thing that ever happened in the saga be for you?

For me, it would be when Bella drank her first cup of blood and was in a way like "Can I have another?" with Rosalie at the same time:"Seconds?". Yuck. Never mind that she might've liked it, but she knew what she was drinking! The mere thought...would you drink human blood? Come on. Would you?

And third question, have you seen the TRON: Legacy movie? Just curious, because I haven't. I know it has nothing to do with Twilight.

A question of your choice

2010-12-27T20:52:41Z

You've probably seen this before, but if you could ask any Twilight Saga character a question and they'd be obligated to answer (truthfully), well, what would that be?

The question can be anything you want, as personal as you want (if you have the guts required) and..really anything.

I think I would ask Edward who he'd pick (between Bella and Renesmee) if he could only save one or if only one could live.--don't get the wrong idea.

Your favorite Twilight line ever

2010-12-23T21:12:08Z

In my own defense, I didn't know there had been a blog with this name.

So, from all the four books of the series, pick one that appeals to you most.

Mine is "Forbidden to remember, terrified to forget.". It makes sense sometimes.

Your favorite Twilight line

2010-12-23T21:08:40Z

From the four books of the series, pick one line you like most or appeals to you in a way.

Mine is "Forbidden to remember, terrified to forget.". It makes a lot of sense sometimes.

Signs that clearly show you're a Twihard

2010-12-17T11:22:37Z

So I know these are on my user page as well, but I really want you to actually tell me if you find yourself in any of them, so here goes :::

When it's a sunny day you wonder what would happen if Edward were there.
You find yourself wondering if a new vampire is responsible for a murder.
Every time someone mentions the name of a character in the book you squeal(this includes all characters, not just Edward).
You find yourself angry or not speaking to a friend who dislikes your favorite character.
If you see a picture of a wolf your first thought is Jacob or werewolves.
You keep hoping that one of the characters will dump their canon pairing and marry you instead.
You decide you want a car that is like Alice’s, Jasper’s, or Edward’s.
If you hear someone mention “Forks” you think of a rainy little town.
You write fan fics, rants, and entire stories on Twilight.
Whenever you hear your parents talk about calling a mechanic you think of Jacob.
You listen for Twilight related words so much that if someone mentions something that is LIKE something in the book, your mind immediately goes to Twilight. An example of this would be if someone says “Spoons” and you think of “Forks” or if someone says “Edwin” you immediately think of Edward.
You tell your boyfriend he can stop by any night he feels like, but he has to enter through the window.
You want to go cliff diving during a hurricane wind in a hope that Jacob (or another werewolf) will be there to save you. Going cliff diving in La Push gives you extra points.
When you hear thunder, you think of vampires playing baseball.
When someone mentions Romeo and Juliet you only know what it is because of Twilight.
While reading Romeo and Juliet you imagine the Twilight characters rather than the real ones. For instance, Romeo=Edward, Juliet=Bella, Paris=Jacob.
After watching a major league baseball game you find it tame. After all, it’s not nearly so interesting as barely seeing the players.
When you were told you were wrong, you insist that New Moon told you so.
When told New Moon is a fiction book you argue with “But –insert your favorite character’s name here- must be real!”
You only go to school on non-sunny days.
You become a doctor just in case you run into Carlisle in a few years.
You deny ever turning beyond eighteen. You can’t be too old for Edward and Jacob, how terrible!
You spend more effort and time rooting for a character (especially a side character) then you do on activities like reading the books, doing your homework, and taking care of your pets.
On your eighteenth birthday you purposefully cut yourself hoping a vampire will try and attack you (and then of course that you’ll be saved by Edward).
Whenever you hear a song about romance you think of Bella and Edward. Double points if you hear a song about someone not being loved back and think of Jacob. Triple points if you can match every romance song in existence with Twilight in some way or form.
You hugged your twilight book and carried it around with you at school all day, after your best friend finally gave it back! (I threatened her, she had no choice...she didn't finish is, but seriously she had it for a week!!)
Your outside in your backyard practicing soccer at about 9:00 pm and it is pitch black. I mean pitch black, but you're not scared because who cares? If there’s a vampire then, well, thank god, maybe you'll get lucky enough to get bitten and spend the rest of your life like the Cullen’s! So you purposely kick the ball really far near the forest and make sure you're wearing a ton of perfume and r really loud when you get there.
You snuck out in the middle of the night, spoke to at least 10 dark and dangerous looking strangers, and drove your friends motorcycle, just to hear Edwards voice in your head
For the in-school presidential election you wrote 'Carlisle Cullen' on the ballot instead of McCain or Obama.
You make up an imaginary friend(Edward Cullen)because no one else in the school even close to qualifies and maybe that’s why I’ve been getting funny looks lately because I might be talking to my new friend, a.k.a myself. He walks to class with me and he’s really sweet. And his eyes smolder and he’s got a crooked smile. It’s pretty glorious.
When you went to the movie, and your friends got wicked mad at you because you got upset about every little difference between the book and the movie like Bella wearing a green shirt to the Cullen's house instead of blue...
You wrote Edward Cullen n Jacob Black all over the paper your science teacher handed out, instead of notes, and now you are going to fail the test, but you don't even care cause your twilight "Notes" look really pretty hung up in your locker!
You almost attacked a girl for saying 'Edward Cullen sucks and is really creepy' to you, when she hasn't even read the books! And you actually growled at her!(It was slightly embarrassing after, but NO ONE insults Edward when I'm around)
You suddenly look at every boy in your school and think 'What a Mike Newton!'
You've read the books at least ten times
You cried when your best friend finally persuaded you to lend them your Twilight book
You went to the midnight premiere of the movie and wore a twilight shirt and your pajama bottoms to school the next day
You search the woods once a week for over-sized wolves
You own at least four twilight shirts
Every single sheet of paper in your school books says Jacob black and Edward Cullen on them, with hearts.
You’d never heard of Wuthering Heights before reading Eclipse, but after reading Eclipse you have decided it is one of your favorite books… Before you read it. (Same goes for Romeo and Juliet)
You tried to get your birthday legally changed to August 2nd
Whenever you hear the name Edward you go “What?! Where?!”
You went to the doctor and called him Carlisle
You buy a ‘Cullen car’ just to see if it comes with a free vampire
You watched the fourth Harry Potter movie and cried when ‘Edward’ died
You decided, before reading Breaking Dawn, that if Edward dies you’re heading for Volterra
You can hear Edward in your head
You asked your parents to cancel your Disney vacation and plan a road trip to Forks instead.
You’re walking alone at night and you wish you could get into trouble with some thugs so Edward could save you.
You throw New Moon at the wall when Edward leaves -- no matter how many times you've read it
When you go into a deep depression when you realize you're done with all the Twilight books
When you wear something that says twilight on it all the time
When you pass notes to your friends that say Edward *giggle* or another Cullen name just to make them giggle in class
When your heart starts to pound when you hear the word "vampire"
You go to your doctor and tell him 'your secret is safe with me'
If you actually spent 5 minutes or so reading these just because they had the word Twilight in them.Or because of the title.

Name things you'd buy that has the Twilight label on them

2010-12-16T21:34:45Z

I DARE YOU. All OF IT.Anything with a Twilight related face or name on it.

- Things that HAVE.Sorry.** :d

Name your Twilight merchandise

2010-12-16T21:31:44Z

I DARE YOU. All OF IT.Anything with a Twilight related face or name on it.

If you were a newborn vampire...

2010-12-10T13:53:22Z

Just a few questions to test your super fan minds.This blog assumes the existence of vampires is true.

So imagine you are in a situation like: you're walking home at night and you get bitten; you're in a dangerous situation and after you get bitten; or you know, quite anything.

1.Where would you most likely be when you'd get bitten?(this is actually more of a choice, as in where would you want to be)

2.You just woke up. You remember the events of the past few years of your life, but the rest is a blur. Would you know what you are and what is happening to you?

3.Would you freak out or be sort of like "This is so cool!" ?

4.After some time passes, you realize you miss your family and you'd like to see them, but you know you can't control yourself. Do you go, hoping you'll be strong enough? Or do you stay away, and watch them from afar?

5.If you chose to stay away: you have quite some time before you can go back to your family (if you choose to eventually). If you remember your Twilight obsession, and realize what's happening to you is very similar or really the same as what is being described in the book as a 'newborn', would you get suspicious of Stephanie Meyer? :)). No, I'm just joking. I know I could care less about Stephanie Meyer if I was a newborn vampire. The real question: where would you spend your time until you could go back to your family?

If you chose to go see them: would they be frightened and not accept you, or would they try their best to understand? (assuming, of course, that you haven't killed them -.-')

6.Would you hunt animals or humans?

7.Now the most fun question:what would you do with your newfound strenght, speed, etc?

8.And do you think you would have a gift?What would it be?

9.Back to more serious matters: because of your age, you can or can't go back to school.What would you do?

10.If you're a vampire...there sure must be others out there.Would you try to find them?And what if there were...the Volturi?

I like mystery at the end.

Recently added question: Have you guys ever considered this before? I know I have.

Breaking Dawn expectations

2010-12-09T16:30:05Z

Well, I wonder what that will look like. I guess I can see why they need so much time 'til Breaking Dawn.

How is she going to do that? I mean, well..kinda awkward..because she's not that old, and faking a pregnancy to make it look real should come as some kind of..challege..right?

I just wonder how they're going to make the effects and all that..*sigh*

I've already seen who is supposed to portray Renesmee, she's cute, alright, and she's not gonna have all that many lines. Well, good luck to her!

Jacob is going to have to be taller than Emmett. How will they pull THAT off, 'cause, I'm laughing my head off thinking how in Eclipse he was still shorter than Edward. I don't care what they do, at least make him taller than Edward, jeez! Make him look at least 22- put special effects on him, I don't care! (but don't you dare change his beautiful face-Taylor's beautiful face, excuse me. Jacob's just a character, he's just a character..okay, breathe.)

Alice and the headaches! Aww....sure, they don't care about that.

Finally Rose gets a few more lines.Yay.Even if she'll be a bitch in those.

Uhhh...I'm looking forward to the food throwing and blonde jokes.

Emmett and wrestling..how cool is that? Even if..you know what happens. :::grits teeth:::

How are they going to do Kristen's makeover for the wedding without making her too beautiful so there will be a difference after the change?

Beautiful expensive cars here we come.......

I just really want to see the Cullens at the wedding. *dreamy* And Tanya...or not.

And the little honeymoon sex talk with Jacob.

Isle Esme is going to have to reach my expectations, or I'll just blame it on Bella for exaggerating.

There was a blog with this issue, real sex scenes (not porn people) in Breaking Dawn. They won't do that, like, show too much, maybe just some "shadows", but that's good enough for me. And the bruises afterwards should be purple...not faint.

I want Breaking Dawn to be close to your average imagination and then exceed it. Like, here we are, one second and we're in the same bed (Bella's) and then we're getting married and there's vamps and werewolves at our wedding and everything is just in constant expansion.

...............................................................................................................................................................

Conclusion: I don't want to see Robert Pattinson in burning pain.

The most annoying girl ever!No,not Bella.

2010-12-09T15:49:12Z

So what do you do when you're babysitting at your house?

NOT try to re-read Breaking Dawn for a little drama.

When a 10 year old who likes Twilight but hasn't read one book of the series is around, you do not pull out the last one and start reading. No, not because you probably should watch over her, but because she'll sit with you patiently, be silent for a few minutes, and then, BOOM!

Every line with a small little uncomprehensable word for her fragile age was expressed.....:::cracking knuckles:::

She went "What does he mean by that?" every page!, or it's just me exaggerating!

So finally, when you get to Jacob's P.O.V- if you make it that far - you, listen to me, YOU have to IMMEDIATELY CLOSE THE BOOK!

Did I?

....no.

She.was.frantic. "What happened with Bella?" "I don't want to read another book!" and "I don't care if this is Jacob stupid point of view, I want Bella!"

UGH.

So my advice, if you babysit, stop. If you don't, don't try it because you want to know what it's like.

And if your parents *coughforceyoucough* do NOT bring any Twilight related item with you, especially when you know the kid is over 9 and doesn't know half the characters.

Why Edward loves Bella

2010-12-07T15:38:29Z

Really, why? I do not see one thing she's done to make him love her. Do not give me the "she smells good to him and so he feels very protective of her". When was that ever a reason to love someone?

So I'm really curious, and since I couldn't figure it out by myself, I'm asking you guys.

What reasons does Edward have to love Bella?

-not the fact he lives for her, because why does he live for her? If you say that you're gonna have to tell me why he lives for her.

-not the fact that he can't read her thoughts. So what? I know I wouldn't fall in love with a person whose thoughts I couldn't read if I could read thoughts which I don't but that's obvious.*huge intake of air*

-not the fact that..hm, no that's it.

Please, logical reasons, not fanatic ones.

Bella gets an abortion

2010-12-03T17:48:38Z

Need I say more?

It's a little cruel...at least the first three chapters are written very fast and with need of satisfaction...I know because I felt so myself once...

I felt so satisfied, call me what you will, just to..see Bella suffer! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!

so anyway,here's the link:

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5759568/1/How_Dare_You

Eventually I will add more fic links here, because..that's what I do..full-time obsessed.

Tell me what you think of it if you read it.

P.S. I haven't gone beside chapter 7 because it's really just this mess thrown in together and lacking much plot that was consumed from the first chapter or the first two. Sounds familiar, anyone?

Breaking Dawn Morals!

2010-12-03T17:35:54Z

So basically this is what I found surfing the net for Twilight stuff, just what a Twi-hard does in her free time.

I do not own this. (so used to disclaimers I don't even notice them anymore) Once I wanted to put a disclaimer on something I owned. Here goes:

"I actually was unable to read it in one sitting like I wanted to because my brain couldn't handle the ridiculousness for more than an hour at a time.

Not even considering how insanely bad the plot and writing were, the morals the book presents made me wonder how Stephenie even managed to get it published.

Moral #1: Marriage is easy. Bella doesn't have to pay for, take care of, or do anything in the way of keeping her marriage going. Not even touching on the whole Mr. Perfect issue.

Moral #2: The only thing worth staying alive for is sex. Bella never stopped considering her choice to become a vampire until she had sex with Edward and then suddenly wanted to hold back. Crying and begging him to screw her because her happy dream was over? Come on girl, have some pride. Pull yourself together, Bella. Sex isn't everything.

Moral #3: Women are only good for babymaking. "Had her body changed because she was a werewolf? Or had she become a werewolf because her body was wrong? The only female werewolf in the history of forever. Was that because she wasn't as female as she should be?" Are infertile females less female because they can't make babies and that's all women are good for? Stephenie thinks so.

Moral #4: All of your problems will be solved for you, so don't try to fix them. That year of wanting to drink human blood? Don't worry about it, you'll just skip it anyway. That baby who's killing you from the inside? Don't sweat it, Edward will just make you a vampire and then you'll be fine. Annoying cub boy won't fall out of love with you? Chill out, he'll imprint on your babies and then you won't ever have to worry about them getting in the way of your perfect love life again. And that leads into #5...

Moral #5: Pedophilia is okay! Just wait until they get old enough (or in Renesmee's case, wait until they're 6 years old because then they'll look old enough) and you're good to go.

I could keep going with the morals but I feel the need to touch on the fact that the ending was the biggest and most awful cop-out I could've imagined her writing. The other books had incredibly kickass, awesome action scenes that pulled me in and wouldn't let me stop reading. Breaking Dawn just built up and built up and then the Volturi just decided, whatever, no battle. Go home with your mutant baby. See you in six years when she tries to make babies with the werewolf and we get pissed off at you again. There were no struggles. There were a lot of solutions springing from midair and the preparation for sacrifices that were never made. "

This is interesting for me, and I wanted to share it with you. Just saying, I've met people before who gave me serious hell for posting something that I didn't get out of my own head.(not on here).

So much criticism for BD...

2010-12-03T17:23:09Z

And all of it true.

" We have to wonder if everyone who claimed that becoming a vampire was a serious, heavy choice was just delusional."

Not a lot of people know that the sequel to Twilight was intended to be a book called "Forever Dawn." New Moon and Eclipse were basically written because Twilight got famous. Way to go Stephanie.

I've seen too many bad Breaking Dawn reviews to not develop my own, but that's too long anyway.

Breaking Dawn, aka "Bitter Disappointment", "Bloody Drama", "Brain Drain", or one that I find funny, "Bloody Diapers" is, to me, just a rushed ending. I don't even care about the characters that were stepped over anymore, you know? It's so annoying, and I know we're just unhappy because it's all about Bella...but it should be all about Bella. Even if the characters are given to little thought...the one thing that annoys me to ABSOLUTELY NO END is that all the characters, and I mean ALL, were all created to suit Bella's needs. Now try to tell me you don't agree.Give me one character, just one, and a trait that he/she has that doesn't serve for Bella. The most common:

The Cullen family: Edward-well duh, he's her lover who she forgets all about when she's pregnant with Renesmee. She knows she's going to die. This is stupid. Why would you give your life up for your baby if you're never going to see her/him, and you're going to lose your husband, who, by the way, hates said baby.

Alice- she sees the future, she's crucial so that the Cullens survive..but it's really just to keep Bella alive.

Carlisle- well, he nurses Bella, right? Bella needs a hot doctor.

Emmett- well....Emmett is there, sadly, to raise Bella's ego, which is already too big to fit Forks. She beats Emmett....with one..little..:::grits teeth::: snap-able..hand.

Esme- to take Bella's side so that she can keep her baby.

Rosalie-who hates her, I don't care what she says. Just to have stupid Renesmee.Thumbs up for Jacob and food throwing.

Jasper (for some reason he's always last:-?) - to make her feel better...to calm her down...and to have someone to be better than at control.

The Werewolf pack - well,they're really there because Jake is there..and even if they say they're there because of vamps...they're really there to protect Bella when the Cullens ditch. It can't be just Jacob, right? And don't give me the "they protect the rez" crap. Seth is there to take on Riley...and I'm gonna break something very expensive that I'm using if I keep going. All other minor characters are that obvious, thank you. Soooo....am I right or am I right? So about those BD reviews...here are some lines I think have a point.(they're not from real critics, but, then again, anybody can be a critic.)

"Throughout New Moon and Eclipse, her character starts to decline. In B.D., Bella becomes intolerable. This girl is unbelievably selfish. She begins the book whining about the beautiful, expensive car Edward bought her. She whines about the wedding preparations, the dress, the ring. Poor thing has to *gasp* marry the man of her dreams! The injustice! She is far more concerned about nameless, faceless people mocking her for getting married young than she is about the happiness of the man she claims to love more than life itself. "

" What Queen Bella wants, Queen Bella must have. "

" In B.D., the author sends the message through Edward that love and blind devotion are the same thing. They aren’t. Truly loving someone isn’t giving them free reign to stomp all over you and everything in their path, just because they think it will make them happy. Real love encompasses the occasional appropriate guidance of the loved one away from self-destructive desires toward a better way. But here, we are taught that if you love someone, you let them have what they want, all the time, without exception. "

"This baby feeds on the blood of its mother and slowly sucks her life away? Bella has to drink human blood, while she’s still human, to save her life and the life of her child? And she LIKES IT? This is the same, human Bella that turned green and almost passed out while doing blood typing in Biology class, right? "

"And the delivery of the baby…that was just plain disgusting. Bella vomiting gallons of blood, her bones snapping right and left, blood vessels popping in her eyes, Edward biting into her womb to get the baby out, and the tender moment when mommy sees baby for the first time is marred by said baby taking a bite out of her mommy."

"First of all, from the moment she opens her eyes as a newborn vampire, everything is better. The world shimmers. She experiences everything so much more intensely, things are more beautiful, more colorful, more wonderful. What’s not to love about being a vampire? Within minutes, she is exhibiting the self-control that everyone else took decades to achieve. And how about the whole I-have-to-have-sex-before-I-become-a-vampire-because-all- my-human-emotions-will-be-gone-for-awhile? Nope! Not only does she still experience all the emotions and passions she had as a human, but they are intensified! By the time we’re finished reading about Bella’s new life as a vampire, we have to wonder why anyone wouldn’t want to be a vampire. All the build-up for Bella to grow and mature through sacrifice and self-denial, wiped away. So much better for her not to have to suffer through that stuff, right? "

OUCHEdit

". I can't even begin to imagine the utter horror of someone who'd actually expected it to be good. "

"I was shocked when I found out Bella was pregnant -- though, it was more of a 'Please shoot me now and spare me' kind of shocked.' "

She's 18, just married, and has never expressed any desire to have children of any sort (much less mutated half vampire children). Add in the fact that the baby was totally unplanned and is slowly killing her... But nope, no biggie -- her heart just "swells to twice it's normal size" -- and here I'd hoped that that was the start of a heart attack or something. "

"The name also needs to be mentioned (though I promise it will be briefly). Why would they name their daughter after the Loch Ness Monster? If it knew, I'm sure the poor thing would be insulted (the monster, not the kid). "

". You know the author doesn't know their character well enough when the readers begin to complain about them being out of character. "

So guys...whatcha think? Are these reviews right..?

Did you honestly honestly honestly like Breaking Dawn? And why?

And...check out my 'Breaking Dawn Morals" blog!

Your favorite actor EVER

2010-12-02T14:23:19Z

Of all time. Really. I'm just curious, and I want to see just how many of you pick a Twilight actor as their favorite.

-.-'

Robert Pattinson and The Goblet Of Fire

2010-12-01T15:39:00Z

Okay so personally, I'm a fan of the Harry Potter series, and just today I watched Harry Potter and The Order Of The Phoenix again, and they mentioned Cedric Diggory quite a few times. I am quite surprized my mind didn't go to Twilight at all, the only thing I thought of was a great boy from 4th year who died during the TriWizard Tournament. Seeing that picture of Cedric in the movie, I gained a lot of admiration for the past Robert Pattinson. It was especially nostalgic because Cedric had died.

So where did this sudden admiration pop up from? He played the character brilliantly..it was the kind of thing that displays what his real, un-eclipsed (if it's a word) potential is. I had never heard of Robert Pattinson before Twilight, the ending credits of The Goblet Of Fire, which I watched, was where I've first seen his name (it was quite catchy and sounded pretty good when I read it :d).

You wanna know what I think? I think Twilight screwed him over, really badly. Because Twilight lifts Edward so above the clouds, no wonder Twilight fanatics didn't think he's beautiful enough to play his character. It was just not a good character to play, in my opinion. All had to be very false, no human emotion, because, guess what? Edward's isn't human!

And let me just tell you, when I see that Rob Pattinson that played a character so nice and natural, I feel so sad at how no one can see him as...really anything other than Edward.

And this will go on, because there's still 2 movies to go, and by then..I think I'll lose all hope for a..rebirth of what was once talented Rob. NO, don't get me wrong. He is very talented, it's just no one can see that.

I guess I understand Miley a little bit more now, not that she was that talented..

So what do you think, was Rob better before Twilight? Let me just tell, for those of you who think Twilight is what made him famous and he should be grateful ::: If You're Talented, You Don't Need A Book Fenomenon To Make You Famous! :::

And, was Twilight good or bad for him? And I'm not talking money or fame wise, I think you know.

OH! And also! I hate it when Twilight fans, despite hating or not having watched the Harry Potter series, WATCH The Goblet Of Fire because Rob Pattinson is in it. How much more shallow can you get?

If you could...

2010-12-01T09:17:21Z

Added by Alexa dreamer20

Well I didn't want the title to say it all,so...

If you could be related (as in,really related, blood related) to anyone in the Twilight Saga, who would it be,and why?And what kind of, hm, what's it called...degree?Like, sister, brother, mother..etc.

For me it would have to be Edward, I'd love having him as my brother because he's very smart and listens to so much music and because, well, duh, all my friends would be soooo jealous.

Then again, Emmett would be a very very close second choice, because he's not dumb people, at all! Too often in fanfiction we see people making Emmett dumb/rude/child-like or all of the above and more.I'd like him to pick me up at school in his Jeep once. Just once would be enough and imagine who'd be the unfortunate one to even try to insult me ONCE. :))

So between those two, I'd choose....can't I have them both??? *whines*

Of course I'd love having Alice as my sister anyday,because I love shopping.Not really into parties that much..but if they were thrown by Alice and she'd pick my outfit for me on the other hand...hm.

Esme would,no question,be the perfect mother.And don't let me get started on Carlisle..now who wouldn't love a father like that?Even if weird,I think,brother.

I like all the Cullens ( the initial Cullens),so it's really hard to pick.

As a brother, I'd like him to be *gulp* E....Emmett.

And as a sister, definately Alice.

AND between those two, I'd pick Edward! :)) I really would like both of them.

Let's compose a Breaking Dawn Soundtrack!

2010-11-22T20:41:30Z

So I've been listening to all these songs...partly for need of new music and partly because I've been thinking about this for a while...I have some suggestions for songs..of course,my opinion exclusively:))

Muse-Newborn

Avril Lavigne-Anything But Ordinary(just fits with the story,not sure how much with the soundtrack for the movie)

Fever Ray-Dry and Dusty

Bowling for Soup-Highschool Never Ends(again,good for the story in general..not necessarily BD,and not really the movie)

Sarah Connor-Just One Last Dance(when Bella and Jake dance..) :((.It's too...blah,for this movie,but for EVERYTHING ELSE that's going on at that particular moment,it's just right.I think.

I think Lux Aeterna should be put on the soundtrack,when Bella's heart stops and Jacob starts getting "the thoughts".Not the whole dramatic part later,just the beginning.

(Doesn't have anything to do with Breaking Dawn,but I was listening to Santana the other day and just thought "OMG,this is so for Jasper".What song?Maria,Maria.It's like perfect!!!)

I think Three Days Grace-Never Too Late is a good song for Jacob and Bella's situation,but I wouldn't have it on the soundtrack.

Placebo-Running Up That Hill-yes,I know it's already been used for Daybreakers,but so what?

My Chemical Romance-Save Yourself,I'll Hold Them Back

Not sure,at all,I haven't even listened to it,but the lyrics are...

Are you ready for a firefight? 'Cause the devils got your number, right We're never leaving this place alive but if we sing these words we'll never die

Get off the ledge and tread the line Not a victim of a victim's life This ain't a room full of suicide We believe it and I believe tonight

We can leave this world, Leave it all behind, We can steal this car if your folks don't mind, We can live forever if you've got the time.

Part of them.Whatev...

I can think of a whole lot more songs for the story,just not Breaking Dawn,not the soundtrack.That's why I was hoping you guys have lots of ideas!

They are,of course,going to pick songs nobody or very few people know about.

Two Steps From Hell-Heart of Courage?

Ohh!!And I've got another one..Tiger Army-Forever Fades Away

And Aerosmith-I Don't Want To Miss A Thing would have been great for Edward..before Breaking Dawn.

AND! If I Had A Heart by Fever Ray.

I'll think of some more songs.Until then,how about High School Musical ON the Soundtrack?:))))

...One issue with Fanfiction

2010-11-16T17:33:57Z

WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP ASSUMING TWILIGHT CHARACTERS ARE GAY??

Seriously!And it's not just fics...it's..some people I know....x_x

Now in fanfiction I expect everything because of its very name.But what about real life?When my friends keep telling me Edward is so gay*gasp* (please forgive me) because they read a few Twilight quotes.The most frequent one seems to be (not only from my friends) "Before you Bella,my life was like a moonless night..." I'm not gonna go on-not because I can't exactly recall what follows and people would give me hell..no-.Personally,I love that quote.(except that then I get reminded the little points of reason for existence are his siblings)

So my question for today is...

Who ever read a slash or fem slash on FF.net?( about Twilight,of course).All other categories (pedophilia,incest-yes,that kind-,majorly dramatic non-canon-with completely wrong pairings) included.

Please note that I don't recommend it for people with severe Twilight fondness or THS.(Twi-Hard Syndrome)

P.S. Never going to read an Edward/Jacob.Ew.I am pretty open minded about fanfiction,but not like THAT,not with Twilight.

Twilight:Eclipse Behind The Scenes Official

2010-11-15T16:53:14Z

So Twihards,I'm not sure if you're already seen this,but I just found it by mistake. (since I got tired or searching for behind the scenes of Eclipse).So here it is.Tell me what you you! (I think these are just cut-out scenes,because of their tones...in Eclipse they're different.) :-??

Added by Myhusky1998

Would Bree Tanner belong in the Cullen family?

2010-11-14T09:30:45Z

Some of us have been upset about Bree's death because it was pointless.Most of us felt that way-or still do-because of The Short Second Life Of Bree Tanner,because until then she was just a misterious little newborn to us.No..not even then.Because of course,the book(Eclipse) is told from Bella's P.O.V., from which we don't find out much about all the characters.But after her own book, Bree grew on us all, and I honestly think her point of view beats Bella's any day.She describes being a newborn vampire like any newborn vampire who hadn't chosen to be turned would (or it's only me).Their discovery (her and Diego's) is very interesting to read, of course already knowing what would happen you're anxious to get to the part when they realize what's really happening.During all that time while Bree described what it was like in the sun and she thought she'd burn like any vampire from mythology, I was like: "Come oooooooooooon!!!".That part is probably my favorite from the whole book, along with the Volturi sequence.

I honestly thought the Cullens would convince the Volturi to let Bree live,but Steph didn't need her taking the spotlight off of Bella,and I think that's the main reason she killed a pretty good character.The story would have been much more complicated,but how would a harmless little newborn (like Bree) stand in the way?She could have been side-taught everything by all those OTHER characters who don't get screen time.

She would make a pretty good Cullen,she seemed nice,and the fact that she wanted to let Edward know about the Volturi and Victoria even though she knew she'd die was the most admirable thing anyone in the whole series has done,if you ask me.She wasn't thinking about herself one bit,much unlike Bella(I just needed to point that out).

So at the end of the day,Bree would make a good Cullen.Not better,just a good one.Better later.I would want to see how she'd get along with everyone,especially her relationship with Jasper.

Twilight Mini-Series

2010-11-12T13:43:31Z

What do you think about a continuation of Twilight in episodes on TV??I know I would absolutely love it.But would Kristen and Rob and everyone else agree to that kind of idea that probably nobody thought about?Noooo...they can't wait to be done with the last 2 movies.

I hate this about Twilight

2010-11-10T19:48:46Z

The thing about Twilight

You know what the thing about Twilight is?All the characters who practically have limitless potential end up getting f***** over(I'm not afraid to say it.But please don't ban me:d).Yes,they do.How many characters do we know that Stephenie just doesn't give a damn about?They're just puppets to better orchestrate Bella and Edward universe.Jake is one example.He even had his own P.O.V.He got dumped,crushed-both physically and emotionally-, and just was there to make everything easier.Just when he took control over his Alpha role,Edward asked him if he could bite Bella to change her once the fetus is out.Yes,of course he agrees.Yup...its just great.All the characters...Alice,who people just love,who makes the story better,who saves their lives,doesn't even have a back story.Yup...waiting for the Official Illustrated Guide like the day we'll use laptops in school.This is what I truly,honestly,HATE about the Twilight Saga.It ends all for me,when Steph gets into details of the past and then just brings back Bella and Edward.

Jacob's character got created,reinvented,it bloomed beautifully.He turned into that person who also is willing to fight for Bella's love,the more exciting character people are attracted to,a new thing,always fresh,and his point of view was brilliant.My favorite part of the series.Bella's eyes before the change are too weak,and after the change are too blind to see anything besides her awesomeness.She was not the best choice for a heroine, or the best choice for a point of view.But what are you gonna do.Bella's gotta be who Bella's gotta be.Which is,at the end of the day,the most important person in the whole frickin' series.End of story.Live with it or not.You kinda have to.

Online log-10.11.2010

2010-11-10T11:42:37Z

So I've decided to keep my personal log on this wiki...it's not meant to be read,but whoever reads it,fine.I just need a place to keep all the things related.

Today's Subject:CrisisEdit

Yesterday I experienced the second crisis related to this wiki.My internet connection was down.Now...what could be wrong there?I had to log in.Because if I didn't,I would've lost a total count of 94 days on here.It is a very big deal to me,because I've gone through so much trouble trying to come back everyday and edit,I was on vacation,I didn't have very good internet reception outside the country,now I've got school..

So the first time,it wasn't the internet's fault,it was wikipedia's.I could not edit anything,and it was about 11 o'clock.I didn't know how long it would last because it never happened before.I was trying to get the two months badge,and I was,again,pretty close.Now..if I didn't get it,sure,I'd be upset,very upset,because then I was actually working on this,then with the side-tracking thing,not so much.Now,last night I had to call my friend who doesn't want to hear me talk about Twilight to log in for me,because somebody pulled my internet cable out.I don't know who that was,but if thoughts could kill...he or she would be rotting.Anyway.I really don't like these experiences,they make my hands shake a bit,because,of course,when you feel like you've worked on something and then suddenly you lose your work,it's not pretty.A good example of this is:::you work on something in microsoft word or whatever you like using as a documents program,and then you can't save it,or your laptop shuts down because you forget to plug it in or any other reason,or it simply deletes itself magically.:::(thank goodness for backup files).Now with the Twihard badge...I really want to get it,even if I don't consider myself as the ultimate Twi-hard..I'm only freaking out when it's serious.A real good challenge would be the 'I sparkle in the sun' badge(not sure if that's the exact name).200 days...wow.Oh,I remember LuckyTimothy is on his way there.Well...good luck.You do come back everyday and post a thousand comments and edits,so,I don't think you need that.Just maybe good luck with your internet connection:)).So..That's today's subject.I don't know what's gonna happen tomorrow.Mayb they'll bring back Monaco.

Creating A Signature

2010-11-08T19:14:10Z

Have you been trying very hard these days to custom your signature, and sometimes you really thought it would work, sometimes you were so close, but obviously, there must be something you're doing wrong.I've read the following page 3 or 4 times, done everything as I should, and it does.not.work.Or I'm a little retarded. ::: http://simple.wikipedia.org/wiki/Help:Making_a_signature ::: Then I've tried about a dozen sites of html for fonts,colors, and whatnot.Okay...still not working?Don't worry, you're not even halfway there!

You're gonna have to read another dozen forums about how to create a signature on the wiki.But no,those won't even tell you how to start..

So when you're done with that!Come back, cut what you think from the code you got on that page above, replace it, put it back, do a little changes, have trouble with wikipedia, check the box(you know,the little annoying box with the option of customizing the sig), uncheck the box.....and only then!Only then can you go to other sites, make your signature, and then realize...it doesn't work on sites like this, because, of course, you didn't think there was some way you're supposed to do it.HTML,BB,ADHD(just kidding)....dude, you must be tired. You just have to come back, write a blog about it, hope that by some unlikely chance that somebody, anybody will save you from the torture...then you just have to wait.And wait.And wait. And be eternally grateful to whoever gives you some kind of tip.

P.S.:

This layout really annoys me.A lot.

2010-11-03T18:35:03Z

I cannot change the New Wiki Look back to Monaco.WHY??It's only the Mono Book there.I have changed it back before and now I just can't.I really don't like this layout,I mean,it's cool and all,but I got used to where the buttons on the previous layout were and all the stuff,so why can't I change back?Can anyone help me?Please?

OUCH-It just hit me in the face

2010-11-01T20:43:05Z

Well, I have just realized something very important. I like shiny badges a little too much. So much, I have failed to realize WHY I joined this Wiki in the first place. It was to help improve it, because I thought I knew so much about Twilight, and it depends, I won't lie, I don't know everything about it. Until today, the goal kinda lost itself...it started alternating between winning a badge and points and actually improving the wiki. Sure,you get a little discouraged when you see the number of edits some have, even if I keep reminding myself I haven't been around here for as long as they have, but it shouldn't matter. Right now, some edits I've done are like a fresh slap to the face.(dunno about it,but LuckyTimothy may know).So even if not one soul will read this blogpost, it's important to me(call me crazy,don't care.)I wanna apologize for actually going against my initial goal, which was improving, not getting an advantage.Which I realize..is virtual.Like,you're not getting anything out of it.Maybe what I was looking for was respect from those with thousands of edits.Gotta work for that I guess...

Best frickin' BREAKING DAWN trailer

2010-10-30T08:55:32Z

I know you have probably ALL seen this already,I know i have like 22 times or more,but I can't get enough of it.

Tell me what you think of it!!After all,it's got like 25 millions views,only Twilight existed at that time as a movie,and it's more than both the trailer of Eclipse combined and all the trailers individually.This is great stuff.

Added by Alexa dreamer20

Youtube idea!

2010-10-30T08:37:01Z

Wouldn't it be cool if we could have on the site an option to rate comments with a thumbs up or thumbs down like Youtube?It would be great to know people's opinions with a thumbs up or down instead of mean reply comments.(even if those will be anyway).

What do you think?Rate a thumbs up or down!:)

If you were one of the Cullens...

2010-10-29T18:48:17Z

If you were one of the Cullens,anyone at all,who would you be?And why?

AND WHAT WOULD YOU DO THIS HALLOWEEN AS A CULLEN?

Which scene is going to be the end of the first Breaking Dawn movie?

2010-10-29T17:10:48Z

I honestly have no idea.The first book is too short to end it there just because Bella's P.O.V. ends.The middle of the book would be where Jacob's P.O.V. ends..kinda.Maybe they'll stop when Edward injects venom into her heart?(the second movie would be great to start with Bella describing the burning,in my opinion)Or maybe they'll stop right when Jake imprints.

What do you think?

Miley Cyrus-Twilight revelation!!!

2010-10-28T19:50:01Z

I JUST REALIZED WHERE SOME OF THE TWILIGHT HATERS MAY COME FROM!!!

Didn't miss Miley Cyrus say she's a Twilight hater?With so many obsessed 10 year olds around the world that follow her moves and behaviour,yo...I'm not surprized.Some of her fans are teenage girls(who don't have a life),so maybe if they weren't brainwashed,they would've gotten to know Twilight and like it.(like us millions of people!:) )

So,maybe some of the haters come from Miley fans.Like the whole generation who watched(s) Disney.Boo.

I'm trying to imagine what a person who likes both Miley Cyrus and Twilight looks like nowO_o

P.S.:Why was there a headline for a magazine in my country that said :::"Miley Cyrus wants in Twilight" people?If she hates it,it makes no sense.

P.S.S.:The only reason I read the series further was because I read New Moon first,and when Bella went to those guys in Port Angeles,I had no idea what she was talking about.I went through the whole book kinda confused.What I liked then-the time Bella and Jacob spent together-right now...I can't really go through those pages again.

And about that little detail,yeah...it's not the best written book in the world(obviously some may say)but it's okay for me because the first thing I liked about Twilight was Bella's P.O.V. because I thought it was original and all that,and the atmosphere it had.

Vandalizing.Need I say more?

2010-10-28T17:27:05Z

Why are people vandalizing Wikipedia?Because they have nothing better to do.period.Before I found out about this wikia,I used Wikipedia for school,for general info I care about,etc.I actually had no idea that you can edit it without an account or something like that!*looks up*So that's where "The free encyclopedia" comes from....So anyways.A few weeks into this wiki I've seen THEM.(*insert drama theme*).I didn't even know somebody did this on purpose...I thought it was like some error,anything,because it looked like you just pressed buttons onto your keyboard like a maniac.(The first page I've seen it on was Twilight(film).)And I wondered...why do people do that?Is it because they have nothing better to do?Or because they just feel mean?Because people who did that are obviously not Twilight fans.Which leads to the next idea:could it have been haters?Usually,I'd say yes.

Now...that leaves users with a lot of editing to do,which is good and bad.Good for badges and the wikia,and bad because you might find the same mistake there the next time(I did) and because it's confusing sometimes.I tried editing the Twilight(film) page where it had been 'vandalized',and it was a bit of a brainteaser.There were sentences deleted in such a way it made no sense,I had to make it up and make it sound..alright(at least).It was annoying.

Now...this does not only affect the users.Mostly it affects the admins,because they're the ones who have to look out after pages,lock some(I don't know what they do,they know best,so etc).

Comments,pages,blogs...vandalizing is frickin' everywhere.It's like work in vain sometimes to try to redo something that's been deleted or so.

So,in conclusion,I would like to address people like that....

GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS WIKIA..pretty PLEASE.Seriously people,go vandalize on the streets(maybe then you'll get arrested and pay!!!Pay I said!)

DUDES!WHAT IF SOMETHING HAPPENS TO THE ACTORS???

2010-10-28T17:07:39Z

I keep getting these thoughts,and they all go like:What if....and the rest is history.So right now,I'm thinking:What if(God please don't let it happen)one of the actors,like Robert Pattinson-who we all know people like enough to freak out-got hurt

Added by Alexa dreamer20

or something,and he would not appear in Breaking Dawn???The world's going to hell for teenage girls.They practically cannot see anyone else play Edward.Seriously.(*mutters*yeah,me neither-not after 3 movies).Of course,I want him to be in tip top shape for certain scenes-that won't happen-so no bad thoughts there.I want to know how people would react to that and if they've actually considered it(no,fangirls certainly haven't,they can't see anything happen to Pattz,never."NOT.HIM.No Way.Oh please be okay!!!!")Blah.

No flaming please,just crossed my mind.

What now?

2010-10-17T20:34:37Z

Actually,what after...let's say,two years.How long is this Twilight obsession going to last?After the two Breaking Dawn movies will be over,a few months will pass,and then..what?Will this be over?And,most importantly,what will happen to this Wikia??I keep imagining it like the old West,abandoned and dusty.I honestly wonder what will happen with it 2-3 years from now.Of course,it'll keep existing,but how long are fans going to keep it going?

I'm boooooooooooooooooored

2010-10-08T15:06:26Z

So,I'm bored.But..I just said that.Edit

I have so many things to do for tomorrow,but I don't want to,so I'm just sitting around....bored..hence the new blog post.Please don't take it seriously,I'm very much blabbering right now,bored and with no reason to write this.I would edit sooo many things,but I'd have to get into it and I don't have that time:d

THE MOST AWFUL BLOG POST IN THE HISTORY OF THE TWILIGHTSAGA WIKIA!!

Twilight Haters-What else is new?

2010-10-05T12:54:44Z

So they say the most obvious reason people hate Twilight is because they've seen or personally know a fan.Yeah,we know that.But why would you hate Twilight if,for example,you haven't even read a book or seen a movie?I know people who don't like Twilight,and they don't even know anything about it.They just hear me or some of my friends blabber about it almost everyday,but other than that they haven't even heard of Bella and Edward.

So can you dislike something,like a book,movie or subject if you don't even know anything about it?Yep,appearently it is very possible.And now seriously,how many people are there that personally know a Twihard?So many you can reach..say,75%?An aproximation of the red space.No..I doubt that.So practically,people who hate Twilight are friends or family of Twihards?

Because,in my opinion,because I've seen screaming fans,you can't hate something because it's popular.Right..?Only if you have a friend or someone in your family talk about it non-stop and you're sik of hearing,but even then you can't hate Twilight itself.Only its popularity.Right...?

Chapter Five!

2010-09-28T19:04:51Z

Disclaimer:I don't own what comes later into the story,like characters from The Twilight Saga,but I do own Crystal,Rae,Bert and Alison.And the idea for the fic.

Crystal Clear Chapter Five:Oh...my.Edit

I tried my best to simply stare and not glare as the stranger that now had a name threw me a grin.

"You found Embry here?How curious..."

This time he threw a grin to Embry himself.

"Cut it out,Jake.Yes,we met at the library." Embry said,in a way embarrased and defensive.

"So,when are you coming over?"

As Embry elbowed him in the ribs,which from the looks of it must've hurt,he merely laughed.I couldn't help but think there was something like a private conversation they were having-and succeding-with me no further than 6 feet.Coming over?Coming over where?And why was there a slight emphasis on 'you'?It made it sound like there have been others before me.Wait,that sounded wrong.I mean,like I was a part of something that I seriously had no idea about.

I raised an eyebrow,trying not to ask him any questions involving our earlier meeting.

Chapter Four!

2010-09-12T18:57:38Z

Disclaimer:I don't own what comes later into the story,like characters from The Twilight Saga,but I do own Crystal,Rae,Bert and Alison.And the idea for the fic.

Crystal Clear Chapter Four:Are you kidding me? Edit

Crystal P.O.V.

”And so mom decided she wanted to move across the country..I didn’t exactly care if it meant she would be okay and away from dad.”

I was pleasantly surprized that I could find the words to tell Embry-which I’d forgotten was a stranger-my story without using big words and curses.

I didn’t know why he sounded so interested in everything he asked,but that made me feel good,like somebody cared.And there was another thing I didn’t know:why was this so good yet so annoying?After my mother died,I’d sworn I’d change.But this part of me was still somewhere,the part that needed help,the part that couldn’t do this alone,and I believe that part talked for the last half hour about a life the changed me didn’t want to think about.

And besides,Embry made it easier,somehow finding one good thing now and then that resulted from what I told him.

He was this cheerful person-the kind I felt sick when seeing-and he seemed to enjoy life.Well yeah,sure,I know how that is,and some would say I’m cynical for seeing things the way I do and voicing that-but I’ve just been through things they haven’t,that’s how I can talk about life and its down sides.

Something out there made me ask:what about him?What was his life like?It was funny,meeting someone that now knows your life story-summarized,of course- but only an hour back,he was a stranger.

These kind of bonds were the strongest-I knew because of Rae.She’s been my only best friend since 3rd grade.We just had this wonderful short conversation-and then boom,we know all about eachother in just a matter of minutes-because there wasn’t much to tell.

But I also knew they would cease to exist one day,giving in to circumstances that can’t be helped.

Going back to the real world,nothing much changed around La Push.It pretty much stayed the same,and that was maybe a good thing-I couldn’t get lost,and if I wouldn’t get lost,I wouldn’t drag attention to myself.

I was definately affected by Embry’s laugh and general happiness.It made me see some good points in this and that.

”And that’s my house.”

I looked to where he pointed and tilted my head.

His house wasn’t much bigger than mine,maybe just taller,but it certainly looked more welcoming and warm.It was a creamy color I couldn’t name and there were four windows visible from the front.It had a driveway and garage,an old pick-up truck parked in the latter,which was open.

When I looked at Embry,I saw a small frown on his face,then his face relaxed,as if he realized something I wasn’t aware of.

”Jake must be making himself confortable.”

He crossed the road and I followed,wanting to stay with him a bit more,and at the same time not being sure if I wanted to meet another person today.

There was someone under the car I was sure was a Dodge Power Wagon from ’62.You see,in my life,I had quite a lot of time to sit around doing nothing.So I found something to do:look into all kinds of subjects,including cars,and I found I liked it.I was obsessed for quite a few years-and despite my denial,I still am.

I couldn’t help but think that the legs coming from under there were a bit too big,but I shrugged it off as the boy got out and dusted himself off.Then of course,I was speechless.

It was him!Life sure likes to surprize me.

A/N:Please do not look up the car.It's horrible.Well,it's not what I initially intended it to be,but I got sick of searching for the right one.Also,sorry for the lack of dialogue and shortness of the chapter,but I'm just not inspired these days.Sigh.

Chapter Three

2010-09-10T16:30:58Z

Disclaimer:I don't own what comes later into the story,like characters from The Twilight Saga,but I do own Crystal,Rae,Bert and Alison.And the idea for the fic.

Crystal Clear Chapter Three:Can't wait to get to know youEdit

Embry P.O.V.

I watched her carefully as she sighed and hoped she wouldn’t walk away from me because I was a little too curious for a stranger.

My thoughts drifted to my brothers in the pack,who had already imprinted last year.I was the only one left,along with Seth and Leah,but I didn’t know if she’d ever imprint on anyone.

Now,I couldn’t believe I found my imprint in the most trivial of places,a library,doing the most boring thing I’d ever been faced with:buying my mom a present for her birthday.I’ve used the time I spent as one of the ’single,lonely people’ as Paul put it to think about-or rather fantasize-about how I’d find my imprint,but then reality brought me back and came up with lots of possibilities,like the one that she might not be alive,or born yet and all that.

The guys’ behaviour has been annoying me to no end,and once it got the better of me,so I asked the most inappropriate of persons what he felt like when he imprinted.Paul said: Suddenly,very calm.Like nothing in the world could annoy me.And later all that crap about gravity and love at first sight.’

Not being able to get annoyed meant a lot when talking about Paul.

I felt like..I felt okay.But as I thought back to about an hour ago,I would classify my life as the most boring,uninteresting and a waste of time.I just could not imagine my life without her from this day forth.But I didn’t know what I could do to have her near me.I was so desperate,and so afraid that I might not see her again.But she lives on the reservation now,doesn’t she?At least it’ll give me some time to explain this to her..or at least make her like me and not think I’m a creep.

So I want to get to know her..at least buy myself some time.

”Okay.But don’t judge me by my family,k?” she said,making me frown.Right now,I only cared about her,and anything her family-well,father-did was of no importance to me.How could I jugde her by other people’s actions?

”Hey,you’re you..don’t worry ’bout it.”

She sighed again.

”You’re from around here,right?”

How did that have anything to do with...well.I was surprized a little,how could she tell?I couldn’t tell if she was from around or not.

”Yeah.”

”Maybe..while we talk..you could..”

It didn’t take me long to figure out what she wanted to ask me even before she said it.

”Show you around?You got it.”

She laughed at how I’d completed her sentence..but there was just something about her laugh that was strained..she seemed like the kind of person that had something keeping her from doing that.That only made me want to find out more.

Chapter two!

2010-09-07T23:03:38Z

Disclaimer:I don't own what comes later into the story,like characters from The Twilight Saga,but I do own Crystal,Rae,Bert and Alison.

Crystal Clear Chapter Two:Can't avoid meeting peopleEdit

I wasn’t very good with describing persons,always using the plain words.But the problem was,there was nothing plain about this one.I knew I was about 1.78 m but he was ridiculously tall.He could very well be over 7 feet,and that was one of the factors that made me not-so-confortable.I was unconfortable at the idea of talking to him,I wasn’t scared of him-I was about to jump off a bloody cliff,for God’s sake.Hey,maybe he’d do me a favor and push me if I was too big a coward.

His muscles were just plain surreal,but I don’t think he was one of those bodybuilders who obsess over their bodies so much.They look kinda disgusting to me,those with muscles to spare.But his looked amazing,and would probably not look so good on any other person.For a second I imagined my father with this kind of muscles-and the thought frightened me.

”Hey.You into diving?”

Okay,I’m usually a person who catches up fast with things,but this one took me aback,and his voice seemed to add to it.It was so deep,I pictured the one who’d try and disobey him.Oh,not a pretty sight,but who’d be stupid enough to do that?Despite his deep voice,he had a friendly tone about him.

My mind was tearing itself apart,what with the option of running away-now why the hell would I do that?I was annoying myself because I couldn’t find anything to say.Diving..right.I like diving,but into a pool or something,and not from higher than 2 meters.But diving from a cliff?I wondered what he thought I was doing,a person with headphones on-currently in my hands-listening to a now suicidal song,since I’d made it look like that to my mind,and standing over a cliff prepared to jump.Obviously,he thought I was ’diving’.

”Diving?”

Finally,my mouth opened,but that wasn’t exactly what I wanted to say.

He took a few steps until he was at my side,but he was facing the sea,so I turned a bit to face his side.

”Yeah,cliffdiving.Isn’t that what-”

I think realization hit him,and I wanted to laugh.Now,what would he be thinking...’I’m standing next to a weirdo thinking she’s into cliffdiving,but in fact she’s into suicide’.

Something along those lines.

He looked at me with a frown.

”Look,you-”

”Don’t worry,I’m not suicidal.” I assured him.

His eyebrows disappeared under his shaggy black hair.

”Cliffdiving..you can call it that,since I was planning to jump but didn’t know what would follow.”

I had no idea why I was telling him I wanted to jump.I could very well be standing up here for the view.

”The water’s agitated,the wind is blowing and there’s a temperature of probably 16 degrees.You still planning on jumping?”

Hm..if I want to go into hypothermic shock.

”Good point.But why are you here?”

I had no idea what made me ask.Probably the fact that I’ve always been more curious that cautious.

”Cliffdiving.” He said with a grin,taking off his shirt.

Now,whoa,I could be going into shock without jumping.

”And he thought I was suicidal..” I muttered,loud enough for him to hear me.

He gave a laugh,but otherwise stepped back.My eyes widened as I realized he was actually going to-

He closed the distance between him and the edge with two big steps,and dove like an expert as my mouth hung open with words that didn’t come out.

I didn’t see him for 10 good seconds,and I thought he might’ve drowned or something,and when police would go around asking for him,I’d either have to keep quiet or simply tell them ’He jumped off a cliff under the pretense of cliffdiving’ in a sweet innocent voice.

Luckily none of that had to happen since he surfaced,way further than I expected him to,and from what I could spot at this height,he had a grin on his face.I didn’t know if he could hear me from this distance,but still I yelled:

”You’re insane!”

But he seemed to hear me perfectly,as he yelled back at me.

”Look who’s talking!”

Yes..he was kind of right,I was planning to jump because I thought I’d make it to somewhere else.Not necessarily a better place,no,but somewhere new.

I guess he was crazier though,since he actually jumped.What I didn’t understand was why I was standing there,staring at him making his way to the shore.

I put my headphones back on and made my way on the same path I had followed to get here.

The boy I realized I didn’t know the name of was nowhere to be seen,not that I minded.I jogged my way back home-the word was stuck in my throat like a fist to the stomach-and as soon as I opened the front door my dad stood there,his hands folded.

”Young lady,where were you?”

What,suddenly worried about me,dad?I narrowed my eyes slightly at his raised eyebrows and tone of the voice.

”I was..out.On the beach.”

”Don’t you ever leave without telling me where you’re going again,understood?”

I snorted.

”Why should I?You never told mom where you went at 3 in the morning.”

His eyebrows came back down,and he glared at me,raising his hand.

”Yeah,that’s right!Hit me!Is there anything else you know to do?!”

His hand stayed raised in the air,I bet he really wanted to hit me.I didn’t even know how he hasn’t done it yet.

When I realized he wouldn’t,I walked past him to my room and slammed my door.

I kept a disgusted look on my face as I took a shower,water splashing on me and the pink walls.Then I remembered about the paint.

I didn’t like the idea of leaving again-especially telling him where I’d go because it was none of his business-but the idea of staying wasn’t exactly thrilling either.

I pulled on my dark jeans,a t-shirt and jacket and got about a hundred dollars from my luggage.I had no idea how I’d managed to raise about 700 in only 3 months.I put the hundred in my pocket and the rest back into my very neatly folded hoodie in the wardrobe.

I walked down the stairs in a bit of a hurry,hoping I wouldn’t catch my father on the couch,but there was no such luck for me.

He cleared his throat just as I put my hand on the doorknob.

”I’m going to town.”

And luckily it wasn’t far away,because I didn’t have anything to drive.I was in still a bit of shock as my father offered to lend me his truck whenever I wanted to move around,but I said no.I couldn’t stand the thought of being in that car,let alone driving it.

As I made it to the street leading to the few shops in the center of La Push,I wanted to turn around,because my brilliant memory forgot to bring the mp3.But sure as hell I’m not going back there for it.

I cursed under my breath and kept walking,praying it wouldn’t start raining too.Dark grey coulds were gathering rapidly,but I made it to the nearest store and got in right before the downpour started.

It was actually a library,and it was the kind of place I hung out in lately.I loved reading,especially because I liked seeing how the human mind thinks.What fantasies occur in people’s minds and just what horrors creep through them.

I haven’t brought any books with me,just my particular favorite,The Stranger,by Albert Camus.I didn’t know why I found myself so much in Meursault,probably because he wasn’t able to feel any remorse or general regret at his mother’s death.Sure,I was more than devastated on the inside,somewhere deep in my mind,but I didn’t let any of that surface most of the time.My mother’s funeral was no exception.I couldn’t stand all the people mourning and voicing their regrets and all that crap-I knew they didn’t really mean it.Who has been there for mom when she and dad divorced and she was put into hospital?I was there,no one else.Another thing I found in common was that both of us focused more on the people there than on my actual mother being buried 7 feet under.

”Hello.” The shopkeeper greeted me.I just nodded and went ahead to the section where I knew I had to find something interesting.

My fingers ran over the titles and stopped every so often,only to keep going.

When I finally found what seemed appealing,I started taking it out,but another hand reached for it.

The first thing I did was withdraw my hand.Then I looked up,and I was strongly reminded of the boy I met an hour ago or so.

It wasn’t the same boy,but they could be brothers,considering how many features they shared.He was tall,but I knew my numbers well enough to say he was shorter than the first,but not by that much.He was well over 6 feet.

Another thing was his russet skin,covering an amount of muscles that was,again,too much for a boy looking about his age.I don’t think he was much older than me,but I’ve been wrong before.

As my eyes traveled to his face from his body,I couldn’t help but stare.Okay,so maybe I could help it,but did I want to?He wasn’t as scary as the first boy,not only because he seemed more relaxed,but because he had that face that stared at me in such a way I was completely baffled.

Whoa.

I shook my head a bit.

”Sorry,did you want the book?”

Wonderful.Of course he wanted the book,so why do I have to state the obvious?Oh,that’s right,because I needed something to break the staring.My staring and his.

He blinked once and shook his head,again confusing me.

”Then can I..?”

It took him 3 seconds.

”Sure,go for it.”

Few things impressed me these days,but his voice was a sound I’ve never heard before,no sound like it even.Calm,kind and concerned,the kind of guy you’d like to talk to.His voice was deep and too matured for his age,another similarity,but it was far more relaxed.

I grabbed the book off the shelf and studied the back for a second,before I felt like I wasn’t interested in it at all,because I had something else to look at.

I looked up again,my hand falling to my side with the book in it.I was surprized to find him staring.I didn’t think I was the thing to be stared at-a horror book cover would be more interesting to look at.And I definately wasn’t the pretty one.I wasn’t the girl guys wanted to date,I was the girl guys wanted to be friends with.My ex-best friend Rae was the dating type,not me.

As soon as he realized I was looking at him,he blinked again.

”Oh,sorry,where are my manners.I’m Embry.”

What I first felt when I shook his hand was just how incredibily hot it was.At first it felt like it burned my hand,but then it got better.I hadn’t said anything yet.

”Crystal.”

I shuddered inwardly at my name.Oh the sweet irony...

”You from around?”

He let go and my hand fell to my side again,empty this time.

”Was.Well,I am,now.”

I could see how that was confusing,even if I knew what I was talking about.I corrected myself quickly.

”I’ve lived here all my life,I moved a few years ago.Now I’m back..”

Again I found myself telling the truth to complete strangers.But at least I knew his name.The first boy was still a complete stranger to me.

”To stay?”

He barely knew me and he sounded concerned and hopeful.I was usually good at reading people,especially after the divorce.

To stay..I honestly haven’t considered it.I was still 17,I couldn’t go and live on my own.No,sure I could,but law said I couldn’t.Yet,I didn’t know what I’d do when I turned 18.

Truth spilled from my mouth again and I cursed mentally.

”I don’t really know.Maybe I’ll leave when I’m old enough.Legally old enough.”

A frown appeared on his face,and it looked out of place there,really.Of all people,he shouldn’t have to frown.

”So you don’t want to stay?”

”Fastest to get to that conclusion.” I admitted.

”Why not?”

I was sure I’d regret the answer I’d give,but there was no other way to go about this,lying not even close,since even if I could lie to save my life,he sounded genuine and concerned,telling him lies would be like telling a 5 year old Santa doesn’t exist and never really did.Even if he doesn’t know they’re lies.

”My mom died and my dad’s not the parent type.I need to get away from things.”

It was the simplest description I could give of my current situation.My dad wasn’t the parent type..yes.He wasn’t the person type.A person wouldn’t have put my mother into the hospital.Only a remorseless monster could do that,after how my mom dedicated her life to him for 25 years.

”I’m sorry about your mom.”

He didn’t even know her..yet he sounded more genuine than any of the pretenders at the funeral.

I was sorry too,but that was as far as I’d go.Any other emotion would lead to something unwanted,something I didn’t want to feel in the least.

I nodded my head,already despising the subject has been brought up.

I would be eternally grateful he changed it a few seconds later.

”Hey,could I ask your help with something?”

”Sure,go ahead.”

I truly had nothing better to do,and I didn’t mind hanging around him since he seemed like an okay guy.

”I’m actually here to buy a book for my..uh..nevermind.”

I raised an eyebrow as he looked torn between telling me and turning around to leave.

”Would that be..for your mom?”

I smile pulled at my lips.

He nodded,but his head was down.

”Hey that’s fine.I’m aware people have mothers.And they often don’t know what to get them,so I’d be happy to help you.”

It was true,I was aware people have a mother and father and sisters and brothers,even if I didn’t.But I wasn’t gonna get revenge on them for being more fortunate than me.

He slowly looked up,and he smiled a breathtaking smile at me,which kept mine on my face for a while longer.

”What kind of books does your mother like?”

”Novels,I think.”

”Wow,we might just get along.Depends though.Most kinds of novels or particular ones?”

He reached his hand to the back of his neck,and I wanted to laugh because..

”You don’t have a clue,do you?”

I actually laughed in now 4 weeks.

He shooks his head at me,and my brain focused on a novel which would be good enough for anyone to like,even if I disliked the kind.

So far I had come up with three:Fear,by Ron Hubbard,Memory and Dream by Charles de Lint and The Memory Keeper’s Daughter,a much earlier novel.

”Hm..come with me.”

This wasn’t the section he had to look into,so I lead him to another one.

I found they have expanded the library-last time I was here you could only find about 300 books.I knew because of the amount spent in libraries,particularily this one.

The style hasn’t changed much,I see,so I knew exactly how to find what I was looking for,if they were here.You could find the oldest books,ones you wouldn’t have heard about all your life,that’s why I liked it.

I found ’Fear’ and ’The Memory Keeper’s Daughter’ and handed them to Embry to study them and see if his mother would like them,while I still searched for the one I thought she’d like most.

”Come on..where are you..”

One of the things I was grateful for was my height-I could reach top shelves.But this library appearently had extra top shelves.My eyes traveled over the dozens of titles,until they found the perfect one.

I reached for it,but it was inches away.

Right when I spotted the old chair that has been in this library for forever,the book popped in front of my face.

”Looking for this?”

I took the book from Embry and opened it to the preface.

Ah,yes.This is the one.If I had been a bit smarter,I would have probably kept it for myself.It was a book I’ve read before,yet never finished.I remember the owner of the library let me borrow it since I didn’t have enough money to buy it at the time,but I never finished it because my parents fought that one time and I returned it the next day.

It was selfish to want to keep it for myself,but I knew Embry needed it more than I did.Not many novels I had in mind would be appropriate,probably for anybody.

”There you go.Bet you five bucks she’ll like it.” I joked.

”You’re on.” But he took it seriously.Okay,I don’t mind a bet once in a while.

He handed me the other two,and I decided to keep ’Fear’,probably to laugh my head off.We walked to the counter side by side,and I remembered the person there.It was the owner!I didn’t know where the shopkeeper had gone,but I was glad to see Mr....Mr... Barlow!Yes,Mr Barlow.

His eyes flickered when he saw us,and I could see him give Embry a glare.Why,I have no idea.Maybe it was directed for me and I have bad eyesight.But I saw how his eyes moved to me,and they lit up.

”Crystal?For real?”

I nodded.

”My God,I haven’t seen you in years!My,haven’t you grown!”

”Not enough so I can reach top shelves.”

It was my subtle way of asking:why’d you add another row?

He laughed.

”Don’t worry,there’s always the chair.” He said,winking.

”That chair is awful.It could break any moment and anyone could fall off it.” I said stubbornly.

”So you’re back?Visiting?”

”Staying...for a while.”

”And you decided you had to pay me a visit!Well I’m delighted.How’s Alison?I think I haven’t seen her in..well,longer than you.”

My eyes darkened.

”And you’re not gonna get to.She died three weeks ago.”

His expression changed drastically.

”Oh I’m so sorry.That’s...really terrible.You..alright?But,dear.Your old man must be feeling awful too.I haven’t seen Bert around here in five years.”

I couldn’t keep the snort in,despite biting my tongue.

”Yeah..he’s swirling with remorse.”

Every bit of the words was dripping with sarcasm.

I don’t know why,but people don’t tend to get when I’m sarcastic,probably because I over-do it so much,it seems like I’m sarcastic about being sarcastic.

I hurried to speed up the conversation as we paid for our books,and with a much-waited goodbye we left.

It was silent for a few seconds between us,and I noticed the rain stopped,but that was about it.I didn’t know why,but whenever Embry would talk,he’d be the only thing I’d focus on.

”I really hope you won’t hate me for this,but...what’d you mean by ’your dad is swirling with remorse’?”

I sighed.I had a feeling he’d find out more than I would ever want anyone to.

My first posted fic!(Almost)

2010-09-06T22:15:47Z

Disclaimer:I don't own what comes later into the story,like characters from The Twilight Saga,but I do own Rae,the main character which you're not finding out the name of yet,and her father.

Crystal ClearEdit

Music was pounding in my ears,drowning out everything around me,not that I complained.It was why I bought these headphones anyway,and they served their purpose.The noise in my ears couldn’t be called music by the old me,but the new me found it soothing compared to what I’ve just been through.Three weeks ago,I was celebrating my mom’s birthday with her friends,and now I’ve just been to her funeral.

I swallowed,keeping the feeling in my gut there.You could say I couldn’t get out of there fast enough,as I boarded my plane to Washington just a half hour after.

Usually people leave to a better place to get away from something for a while or permanently.I hated both where I was leaving from and where I was headed to.Neither provided any kind of safety for me,and neither was filled with good memories.I was due to arrival in 4 hours and staying for an undetermined period of time.

Even though thinking about my destination was something I detested,I would be stepping on its ground soon enough.Forks,Washington.Somewhere on the boundaries of that insignificant little town the Quileute rezervation of La Push set its own.

Years ago,it was the only home I had ever known.But then what I assumed was tragedy slapped me in the face once with my parents’ divorce.I pretended to be okay,not caring that they got separated because it wasn’t the end of the world,but it certainly put an end to my fantasy world.I was living this life I hate thinking about,so I’m not even gonna get started.

I didn’t need a reminder-not even from myself.If this is what makes me immune to everything,then so be it.I couldn’t complain about this either as the plane took off,flying me to what ironically would be my personal hell.

My mp3 shuffled through songs quicker than usual-but usual wasn’t on the schedule of the new me.The average-huh,yeah right-song lasted 2 minutes.I just could not stand listening to the 3 or 4 minute crap I put up with before.

My best friend told me it was the worst sound she’s ever heard,and I just shrugged at her.That is something-or,whatever,was something-considering how much I hanged on her every word.But now we weren’t best friends anymore.Having a friend was about having someone to understand you beside what your parents could do,for a part.Rae didn’t understand me anymore.How could she,when I didn’t understand myself?I wasn’t looking for her advice anymore,and I didn’t go to her when tragedy striked me for a second time in my life,but I didn’t exactly close off from the world.I just didn’t give an honest damn about the world around me.That doesn’t necessarily make me unobservant,because I noticed how a boy looking about 10 or so kept looking at me from a few rows ahead whenever my songs shuffled.I knew he was staring at my black clothes and general glaring towards any cloud passing by.There were tons of actions people did that seemed so pointless to me I tried not to snort.Just people living in their pink little bubble.I gave a malicious grin as I imagined the plane crash and everybody panicking,their pretty little worlds cracking.Sure,anyone who’d hear me think would classfy me as a mean goth girl.

I wasn’t mean,and I definately wasn’t goth.Music couldn’t make anything out of me,and friends even less,but that’s just another fact of my life.

As the songs shifted further and further into my 1000 songs playlist,the plane hit the ground,of course,not as I imagined it a few minutes ago.

I barely felt the bump as a particularily blasting song broke through the headphones.I couldn’t give more of a damn about the name of the band or so-called artist playing,because I only listened to the lyrics.

But as soon as it stopped and we could leave,I was the first to leave it,not because I was eager to meet my doom,but otherwise my saving,I left because I felt trapped into a world of happy people.I knew the world outside wouldn’t be much better in a town as small as Port Angeles,and even worse as I’d get to Forks,but as I had my mp3 with me,it made things less horrible.

Nobody would pick me up at the airport-but that’s what busses were for.I preffered a gum-stocked bus rather than my dad picking me up in that horrible stinking truck,it was absolutely repelling.I didn’t need directions-I’m sure it hasn’t changed much.I even managed to spot a boy I haven’t seen in positively 6 years,but that I didn’t remember the name of.

The bus stopped short on Forks,so I had to walk to La Push.Charming.But I gave it a thought,thing that I don’t do so much lately,and realized I don’t mind anything that delayed my arrival.

I knew from experience and common knowledge that Forks was not a town you wanted to live in if you didn’t like the massive hours of rain devoted to this place,but I haven’t bothered to bring a jacket.And so by the time I got to La Push,I think the clothes in my bag were wet too.

But I couldn’t say anything anymore as the beach came into view.La Push,despite holding despised memories was a peaceful place-for most.It was far quieter than Forks and smaller,but not by much.

I wasn’t far from my once-adored home,yet now I couldn’t hate the place more.

As soon as the sand got solid and I was walking down a patio to the door of hell,I looked up.Seeing this house after the divorce and moving away was hard-but this-,this was like a fresh slap to the face.

It was fate’s twisted way of telling me:that’s what you get for living a perfect life.

This time I snorted.More like a perfectly virtual life.

My..dad’s truck was parked on the curb,still as messy as ever.Mom and I used to make fun of him for loving that car-but now it holds bad memories,as does everything else around me.But there was nothing that came close to the house in front of me.

My heart couldn’t beat faster as the front door parted with the wall.If I reffered to this as hell,then it seemed obvious that the devil would be opening the door to me.Who I found standing there was nothing like my father,not even close.But of course,this was appearence,and I’d never judge a book by its cover,my unofficial motto.Doing that took me so many places I never wanted to go,but it took its toll on my mother.She was so in love with dad,she said it to me over the divorce.He was just the perfect kinda guy for her.I see now just how perfect he seemed to be.He’s wearing jeans and a t-shirt and waving at me with a kind smile on his face.If this were any other me,she’d run right to him and hug him,telling him how much she missed him.But this me wanted to turn around and run like hell.

It didn’t help the situation if I stood there staring like the idiot that I was.I swallowed down my feelings again and took the first step forward.I didn’t have to walk long before I was wrapped into an unconfortable hug that I didn’t want to return.

”Hey kiddo.How are you feeling?”

One of the few things my dad never did was talk about feelings-he made sure I had someone to talk to though,that’s why mom knows all about me-knew.She knew enough for both of them.

Now,how was I feeling?At the moment,disgusted.How did he think I was feeling?I was perfectly fine physically,so I guess that was the answer,since I don’t give more of a damn about my condition than I do about the world.

”Fine.” My voice came out confident,despite the lack of that I was experiencing.Again I cursed the one who filled me with common courtesy.

”How are you?”

”Your old man can take a lot of things,but he can’t take seeing you hurt.So,now that you’re here,I’m happy.”

I bit my tongue,a habbit I’ve gotten a few weeks ago when I knew I really didn’t have to do or say what I wanted,because it would end up bad.Nodding helped too-it was an alternative to shaking my head furiously.

I walked past everything,stumbling up the stairs to my old bedroom.The first thing I had to do before I even settled my backpack down was redecorating.

I ripped all the pictures from my beloved wall a few years back-they hurt to look at in more ways than one.I cleared out what clothes I left here in the wardrobe I had always been proud of-I had the biggest one of my old friends and threw the clothes into the big garbage bin outside.I could’ve donated them,but this was the new me.

I took the covers off my one-person bed and put them somewhere in the hallway cabinet.

Then I got out all my posters and cds.I sticked them to everything I could-walls,door,even the mirror-I didn’t need to see myself these days.Plus,I had another mirror in the bathroom-ah,the bathroom.The horrible pink in it sent shivers down my spine.I had to get a tin of paint tomorrow and spill it over the walls.

I knew how my actions made me look like a troubled emo or something,but I really wasn’t.I was mad at life and it was mutual.

I took a look around the room,and was pleased to find you could actually look at it.There,my job’s done.I threw my body on the empty matterss of the bed and my hands went under my head,my eyes closing.

That was the most horrible night I’ve had since the day dad and mom fought.I couldn’t describe the nightmare that greeted me.It was the perfect setting,and when I woke up I thought it couldn’t be worse-I was in the house of my nightmare.But everything I put around was a reminder of the timeline I was living in.

I sighed disgusted and stood,ignoring the creaks in the wooden floor.The sun had just come up,but I took it as long as it took me to change to disappear behind the clouds.

I got my crippled clothes from my bag and threw jeans and a hoodie on.I had a fairly big number of those-11 and I planned to add to it.

My long black hair was mercilessly placed into a loose bun and my mp3 took its irreplaceable part in my day as I tried to make as less noise as possible and slipped out of the house.

I ran along First Beach until I reached the cliffs,and my feet didn’t listen to me anymore on the way back.I wandered around until I found the path that lead up to them,and the air inside the woods was ever colder than on the beach.

I pushed away the last of the branches and I realized I wasn’t far from the edge.Looking over it,it seemed even higher.The waves were smashing violently against the rocks and chills ran through me.

I didn’t realize the danger I was in though.My mind was the danger,as an idea formed into my head,dangerously close to my ’do’ button.

I was hypnotized by the foam of the waves and wind blowing hard into my face.

And the song that was playing wasn’t helping my rational judgement either.It was Closer To The Edge by Thirty Seconds To Mars,one of the few bands I actually cared about.I pondered for a moment how it would be if I could be by my mom’s side again,and I found it as not a bad idea,standing close to falling.

Air didn’t seem to want to fill my lungs as I decided.

But even without my hearing and sense of smell,I wouldn’t go back on this.That was,until even through the song at its maximum,I heard a sound similar to a twig snapping.It must’ve been a hell of a large twig for me to have heard anything.

I turned around and removed my headphones,my eyes searching for the source of the sound.

What got out of the wood not far behind was hard not to stare at.It was probably one of the boys on the reservation,with the black hair and dark eyes,but I’ve never seen quite a boy like him in my life.

A/N:sorry about the song,I couldn't find something more original so fast:d It'll probably change over time.